I’m in my Jack’s Lament Era…

I love October and dare I say, it’s a perfect month. It’s got a lineup of the best qualities: it starts with my birthday, football season is in full swing, the weather (hopefully) finally starts to transition into fall, and it ends with Halloween (aka the best holiday). You get to break out all of the fun seasonal decor, eat delicious foods that are finally in season, light autumnal candles that make your house smell like baked goods or a forest, and you get to watch spooky movies or read spooky books that just feel more immersive at this time of year. It’s got CRISPY MORNINGS.

So with all this perfection, what’s the problem? We could never have too much of these things, right? RIGHT?! WRONG. In pursuit of maximizing this perfection, we’ve gone too far.

[cue Jack’s Lament]

Yet year after year, it's the same routine
And I grow so weary of the sound of screams
And I, Jack, the Pumpkin King
Have grown so tired of the same old thing…

I used to love seeing people post their early fall decor, their autumnal recipes, and seasonal bucket lists in late August / early September. It got me excited for the season and thinking ahead about my fall plans. Now we’re inundated with influencers and brands doing the same “Me on July 31 vs August 1” reel and it gives me the ICK. First, can we give the capitalism a break??? Like damn, I don’t want to feel like I have to run to TJ Maxx in peak summer for a slim shot at finding a ghost pillow everyone on their PR list has already posted online. Meanwhile, those same influencers are posting Christmas rn (it’s October 26).

Second, and this might make me a hater but someone has to say it, half the people posting in this manner are doing it under the guise of authenticity and omg how unique and quirky are they for wanting it to be October for the full year — girl, we know you’re doing this for the likes and home decor sponsorships. We can tell which people are actually the Halloween Girlie™ that you’re pretending to be. And for the record, by the time Halloween rolls around each year we’re all done with sweating our buns off and frankly need a little cool weather and seasonal joy to perk ourselves back up.

But here’s my actual problem: I have fallen into the same trap as everyone I’m criticizing. In pursuit of maximizing the joy of the season, I’ve made it stressful and dreadful. Outside of the Octoberness of it all, this time of year is one of my busiest — we’re always slammed with work, the semester is in full swing (both for me as an educator and as a parent of an elementary student), and there’s like 4 trillion events on the calendar. So why tf am I letting the propaganda about maximizing the holiday get to me???? Why do I find myself on the Target app on August 1 trying to grab Halloween decor before it sells out?? Why am I making myself angry that it’s not 60* every day yet and that I’m tired of being sweaty (this is maybe more justified, but still)?? Why am I saying yes to attending all the Fall Festivals AND committing to chairing the Fall Festival at my son’s school??

And here’s my biggest confession: I think I’m looking forward to Thanksgiving and Christmas more this year. I know. I KNOW. WHAT TF AM I DOING OUT HERE????

So this is me putting it out in the universe and formally documenting my feelings, so that next year as the season rolls around I can remind myself to Just Say No. It’s okay to slow down and actually enjoy the month. Part of why it’s so magical is its exclusivity on the annual timeline — it’s just 4 weeks, and rather than miss out, I’ll actually get to savor this time if I show a little fckn discernment. I don’t have to buy a bunch of junk or deem myself a Halloween girl and feel responsible for maximizing the holiday for others to have a good time. 

And if you see me talking nonsense in September 2026, for the love of all things autumn, hold me accountable. Save me from myself. 

xoxo, Em